Archives for October 2016

Thinking with A Big Head

October 29, 2016 by costaricaguy Leave a Comment

This is a three year old post that, due to recent events, I thought I’d resurrect…

Are you a “successful” person?

I’ve had a few successes in my life. I guess the fact that I’m still here after 53 years is, in many respects, a success.

But I’ve also experienced this phenomenon throughout my life that generally arises on the heels of success…

Failure!

Be it moral, financial, colossally stupid-ital, or otherwise.

Why is that?

And it doesn’t seem to be an occurrence unique to me.

Can you identify?

Here are a few notable for instances…

The iconic music diva. She may have come out of nowhere to achieve fame and fortune. But once it arrives she morphs into a super-sized bitch of epic proportions.

The child star. A ironic example because even though the head hasn’t developed enough to handle the success (so they pay others to do that for them), they tend to implode from big-headed-ness.

The rock-star politician. Need I name names? They may have gotten into it as a champion of the people, but once they achieve talk-show celebrity fame…it all tends to become about something different…about them. “The people” just don’t matter that much anymore.

The tele-evangelist. They engage in fiery rhetoric encouraging us to be like Jesus, but behind the scenes their actions are better characterized by Satan than the Son of God.

Success is like air to the ego…it inflates.

Sometimes to the point of a spectacular and very public bursting.

All too often an inflated ego gives rise to this elitist mindset that somehow we are different. That we have been touched with greatness.

Well, “being touched” has a more negative connotation that might better explain the reality of the situation.

That is, success can indeed lead to a state of temporary insanity.

And, if you’re not careful, that can lead to a more permanent condition of derangement.

It happens again and again with so-called celebrities. But it also happens on a smaller scale with you and with me.

I know I’ve experienced it. In fact, I recently posted about a notable success I once had that landed a big payday.

And you know what? Almost immediately thereafter I blew it…my life literally imploded from my own big-headed-ness.

I made virtually every mistake in the book and failed from almost every perspective possible.

The truth of the matter is that success does not regenerate or transform who we are into something greater and grander.

We remain the same potential putz of infinite negative possibility.

That is, success never makes us immune from following it with something really dumb.

In fact, it often dramatically enhances the probability of that occurring.

If we’re not careful.

From an observational standpoint, it appears that those driven towards success for self-centered reasons tend to be more susceptible to the phenomenon.

While those who are driven by the potential for impact tend to stay more ego deflated.

It’s kind of like the difference between a Blake Mycoskie (maker/giver of shoes, billions of them) and a Donald Trump (billionaire/real estate mogul/loud-mouthed celebrity clown).

Who would you rather emulate?

It really comes down to motive…your why.

And that’s in large part what this blog is all about.

The moral of the story…

don’t let success go to your head…

because in reality, it’s still just a stupid head.

Thinking with the big head is better than its opposite. Thinking with A Big Head can get you into even more trouble. Tweet it Out!

image credit: Matt Woitunski via Compfight cc

On Asking for Help

October 25, 2016 by costaricaguy Leave a Comment

Isn’t it true that we loathe asking for help? On the flip side, we generally don’t like being asked either, now do we?

Why is that?

I believe it’s because we tend to equate the act of asking for help with some form of weakness, or helplessness. We are conditioned by our American Judeo-Christian upbringing to cling to the notion that “god helps those who help themselves.” That kind of puts it all on him (god) and let’s the rest of us off the hook, doesn’t it?

We are also conditioned by our rugged individualism, the sine qua non of the American “can-do” spirit, to never ask for help and to look down upon, or judge, those who do.

But, whether we want to admit it or not, we all ask for help, routinely, in one way or another.

Even if you’re a super successful business person, like, say, Donald Trump, (I know his “success” is arguable, but just put that aside for a moment), you routinely ask for help. Donald has sought help from banks and investors, the essential capitalistic act of using other people’s money to achieve one’s dreams. He sought help from the American legal system when he was unable to pay back those loans and had to declare bankruptcy, multiple times. He now seeks help in the form of the required votes to carry him to victory in the 2016 presidential election. And, like many billionaires, he asks you and me for help in picking up the tax bill he refuses to pay with his purported billions.

And Donald is no different than any other “successful” business person out there…they’re all beggars when it comes right down to it.

A business owner who asks for your patronage is, in a real sense, asking for “help.” Maybe not in the quid pro quo received in exchange for your buck, but the act of patronage itself, when there are so many other options you could choose instead, is certainly a form of help.

Recently I launched a GoFundMe campaign. Doing so was met with much trepidation on my part. I was very anxious about being judged about asking for help, actually feeling shameful for doing so.

We really shouldn’t feel ashamed about asking for help. It’s an essential human act of connection. It connects us with others. It sparks feelings of gratitude on the part of the helper and the helped. Gratitude for the opportunity to have a positive impact on a fellow human, gratitude for the feeling of being cared for, and of not being alone in this sometimes harsh world. Gratitude is a positive human emotion, one of the best actually.

Why is it that we are much more prone to give help to causes (or people) removed from us than we are to those who are closer to us in some intimate way? Same goes with asking for help. We feel much more stressed and shameful about asking a family member or friend for help, than we do about asking strangers. I know I do.

In the Latino community family is everything. My Colombian wife is a good example as she will literally give the shoes off her feet (and she really loves her shoes) if anyone in her family is in need…without a moment’s hesitation. And it doesn’t matter to her what impact that act might have on her own well-being. She is really a wonderful lady in that regard. One of the many reasons I love her so dearly.

But Americans, at least from my perspective, are often more reticent to relinquish “hard-earned” property to help a family member, or a friend. Maybe that’s because the idea of private property ownership is much more fundamental to the American sense of well-being than it is in Latin America.

Nevertheless, asking for help, as well as giving it, connects us as humans. I believe that’s a very positive thing. Despite what Ayn Rand might say, altruism connects individuals and a connected society is a more stable, successful and fulfilled one than the alternative, where each individual functions as an island to him or herself. The idea being to accumulate as much on one’s island as possible, while erecting signs that warn others against trespassing for favors.

The truth is no one’s an island. It really does take a village.

Asking for help sparks a deflation of ego. That’s another positive result one receives from engaging in the act, in addition to the gratitude one feels from receiving help.

Bottom line: We all need help and we all ask for help…in different ways.

I believe that asking for help should not be viewed as a shameful act.

And I believe that giving it should be viewed as a wonderful opportunity to make an impact.

Asking for and giving help is a win win proposition. It provides verification for the existence of the Big US.

These crowdsourcing platforms that are now available provide wonderful opportunities to ask for help…from friends and family, as well as complete strangers…and to give it. In that regard, I view them as platforms of connection and impact. Pretty cool stuff!

You can check out my campaign by clicking the widget below…

and no, I’m not ashamed for asking…

Recently I launched my Crowdsource Campaign, dubbed Looking for Light in a Dark Tunnel. That’s perhaps too gloomy a metaphor for the state of my life right now. Even though it feels like a “tunnel”, I know it really isn’t at all. There’s plenty of light all around me. I’m surrounded by the natural beauty of Costa Rica and by the unconditional love of friends and family. I am imbued with a strong sense of direction and determination. I’m motivated. I’m taking action. The results will come. The pot will boil.

You see, I’m not failing. I’m simmering.

If you’d consider helping me by turning the heat up a little, please check out my Campaign Widget below.

I’ll be writing about my progress in the coming weeks and months. I hope that my story can be an inspiration that might help you simmer with joy as you patiently wait for your pot to boil.

Check out the rewards section to see my various expressions of gratitude for your gracious gift of light.

On Feeling Judgment

October 23, 2016 by costaricaguy 1 Comment

One thing humans definitely excel at, in comparison to other species, is the art and act of judgment. We’re really good at judging one another, aren’t we?

Now, this post is on feeling judgment and does not address in any way the act of earning judgment. We all do that. We all deserve to be judged. Our great religions tell us that very clearly. But they also warn us against being the one who judges.

Of course, the gravest consequence of feeling judgment is guilt. That’s another thing humans are very adept at, again, in comparison to other species. And that is suffering from the pains of guilt…usually as a result of feeling judgment.

My own experience, especially these days, is that I feel a lot of judgment. And, certainly, I’ve earned it. But, again, the universal human activity of earning judgment is not relevant to this discussion.

I mean, it’s very difficult to get through an entire day without earning judgment for something, right?

What do I feel judgment for? Well, here are a few examples that quickly come to mind…

I feel judgment for being in Costa Rica and unable to visit my ailing mother.

I feel judgment for being separated from my children.

I feel judgment for economic failure.

I feel judgment for moral failure.

I feel judgment for adopting a political and philosophical mindset that is often at odds with those I love.

Judgment can be crushing. We deeply wound one another with this brutal act. And why do we do that? If we indeed all deserve judgment, then why do we also feel the self-righteous need to engage in the act of judging others?

I believe the act of judgment is essentially one of separation. We judge others in order to place distance between ourselves and them. It makes us feel superior to do so. And our egos feed off that feeling of superiority.

The U.S. is a country where judgment is almost a way of life. We judge others on account of their political affiliation. We judge them according to their race, religion, or sexual orientation. We certainly are fond of judging folks based on their socio-economic status.

I believe that’s why the poor in the U.S. in some ways have it worse than the poor in other countries, like Costa Rica, for instance. Here you really aren’t judged by the make and model of the car you drive, or even if you have a car at all. But in the U.S., if you’re poor, you are made to feel judged. You are made to feel like a second-class citizen.

Of course, the ultimate acts of judgment are those which take place in our criminal courts. Those who are so judged then have to endure the most extreme separation from society, as they are locked behind concrete walls and steel bars. And then when they are finally allowed out of their cages, they are judged as unequal citizens, without the right to engage in society as normal non-felonized human beings.

I’m writing this post on feeling judgment today because it really sucks. As I mentioned, I’m on the receiving end of a ton of it these days, so I write from my own experience.

The act of judging another human being, even one as worthy of judgment as yours truly, does not really elevate the judge to a higher human status than that of the judged. You see, we all deserve to be judged in one way or another. None of us are perfect…far from it.

So, what do you think gives you the right to judge, other than this false feeling of superiority?

Maybe there’s a reason the bible has strong admonitions against judgment, where it says…

Do not judge, or you too will be judged.

Matthew 7:1

Christ himself, whom the Christian religion claims is really the only one worthy of carrying out judgment, since he alone is without sin, came not as a judge, but as a compassionate redeemer. He did not try to separate himself from the judgment-worthy. He embraced them.

I believe compassion is a more effective tool for rehabilitation than judgment. It seems I’m fairly alone in that sentiment, but I truly believe it nonetheless.

I believe we need to stop being quick to judge and separate and start being more prone to forgive and connect. Tweet it Out!

What do you think?

A Capitalist Conundrum – Capitalism Run Amok – Part 3

October 21, 2016 by costaricaguy Leave a Comment

I found myself involved in a Facebook discussion this morning with a couple of really smart cyber-friends concerning what I would consider to be “a capitalist conundrum.”

The discussion was triggered by the meme to the left. It’s basically a slam against “trickle-down” economics, or the idea that if we get out of the way of the rich, that their success will inure to the benefit of the rest of us poor saps. That theory, while it might sound logical, has not shown to be a very viable one in practice.

But the discussion centered more around a comment that implied that there is a disconnect between profits and wages…that the only thing that does and should determine wages are needed skills. That there is a market for needed skills and that market sets the price for said skills. How those skills are then employed, and to what success, is irrelevant to their price.

And that would be correct, according to a standard capitalistic theory of economics. The purpose of the business enterprise is to maximize profits for shareholders, or owners, period. And if it can exploit workers in the process of achieving that purpose, then fine, go right ahead. After all, the workers can opt for another job in which the market for their skills will pay them more, correct?

Well, maybe.

In practice, when one is forced to shop their skills in the marketplace, the results are often not so stellar. That’s why the government often has to extend and re-extend unemployment benefits…to the chagrin of the same business owners whose exploitation is causing the need for extension.

I believe this notion of a disconnect between profits and wages is at the heart of the capitalist conundrum.

After all, what does a business enterprise really consist of? A corporation does not exist in physics, only in law. The activity of a corporate business enterprise is that of the flesh and blood humans that pledge allegiance to it, either as owners, employees, or both. The owners of a corporation are no different in that regard than the factory-line workers.

Let’s put it this way, even in this age of increasing automation, if you take the humans out of the enterprise, there is no enterprise.

Now, if those humans work together efficiently and effectively to the success of the enterprise, why is it that only the owners should enjoy the benefits of that success? Well, because capitalism tells us that things are just that way…

But that doesn’t make it right, or even reality.

It is my opinion that capitalism attempts to impose its own reality upon us. A fictitious version of reality in which profits and needed human skills (or even needed humans) are disconnected. One in which profits are more important than people or the planet they inhabit.

The problem with this capitalist conundrum is that if in the pursuit of profits, workers are exploited in the name of hoarding profits and building value solely for owners (a situation that has been occurring at increasing levels over the last 40 years), then the system breaks down. Workers aren’t as motivated, perhaps rightly pissed. Strikes ensue. Government has to step in with regulation. There are less and less ordinary folks, workers in their own right, able to buy the products or services of corporate America. A recession occurs, maybe even a depression. Revolutionary impulses are fomented. Shots are fired, wars begin, society crumbles.

I may be being a bit over dramatic, but all this has happened before, hasn’t it?

The idea that business enterprises should be able to pursue profits, and exploit workers in the process, without any government interference, lies at the heart of neoliberal capitalist philosophy. It also lies at the heart of the problem we’re now in with inequality rising to never before seen levels.

It is simply not reality to say that wages and profits are disconnected. It might be correct according to a certain brand of economic philosophy, but it is not real world reality. Corporate profit generation requires people and the resources of the planet in which we all inhabit…profits are not disconnected from those things.

A philosophy that ignores the connections between human (worker) and planetary well-being and macro or micro-economic success is not a sound one.

That is a capitalist conundrum and we need to be able to escape from its impact blinding influences.

My new book, The Impact Revolution, is now live on Amazon. It was written to inspire empathy, to inspire connection. It was written to inspire the positive impacts that flow from empathy and connection. It was written to inspire an acceptance of the idea that we’re really all in this together.

Get the Book!

Chasing Wind – Capitalism Run Amok – Part 2

October 18, 2016 by costaricaguy 1 Comment

And I saw that all labor and all achievement
spring from man’s envy of his neighbor.
This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

Ecclesiastes 4:4

I want to be rich! Ever had that thought?

I have.

But why?

The verse above offers an intriguing and thought-provoking explanation. The explanation is not completely true, because, after all, a man’s gotta eat. But normally we aren’t satisfied with just putting a roof over our heads and bread on the table, now are we?

We want more than that, much more. We want “the good life.”

And that life is usually defined by how many possessions we are able to accumulate. Proof of capitalistic success is always measured in this way. And since the measuring rod is accumulation and consumption, we strive to do so at ever increasing levels.

Enough is never enough.

Greed becomes good.

Envy becomes a positive motivational force.

And all that whipped up into a frenzy becomes, as I am fond of saying, “capitalism run amok.”

Nowhere in the bible is envy considered a virtue and I don’t believe the verse above signifies that envy is “proper motivation.”

Another word for envy is “covetousness.”

Exodus 20:17 states that “you shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.”

That happens to be the 10th commandment.

Hmmm, let’s evaluate this for a moment. Solomon says that “all achievement” (which I really take to mean a “lust” for achievement and more possessions than one really needs) is motivated by envy, or covetousness. The 10th commandment forbids covetousness.

Does that mean that the very root of capitalistic excess is contrary to God’s will?

The paradox is that in the U.S. we often equate “unrestrained” capitalism with freedom. We describe ourselves as the model of a free capitalistic society. Any idea, political view, or policy initiative that imposes even the slightest constraint on our capitalistic freedoms is quickly branded as socialism and its proponent as an enemy to our capitalistic way of life.

But freedom always carries with it responsibility. Is “capitalism run amok” responsible? I don’t think so. I think it’s driven or motivated exactly as Solomon describes in Ecclesiastes. I think it’s motivated by the covetousness expressly forbidden in the 10th commandment.

And where has it taken us? Well in 2008, to the brink of ruin…that’s where.

Now is a great time of examination. Now is a great time for us to step back as a society and take a hard look at who we have become. Now is a great time to exchange the capitalism run amok that has gotten our society into quite a mess for a different more compassionate brand.

One that cherishes freedom, but also recognizes the responsibility it carries.

One that recognizes when enough is enough.

One that recognizes that the blessings we enjoy should be shared, should be spread around.

One that is less concerned with protection of private property and more concerned with promotion of public prosperity.

Post Update: This was written in 2009 at the time of our nation’s great recession. We made it out of that one. Will we make it out of the next one?

Get the Book!

image credit: valhb Flickr via Compfight cc

On Veering Left – Capitalism Run Amok – Part 1

October 17, 2016 by costaricaguy 3 Comments

This post was first written by me on August 8, 2009…

Funny how we change our perspectives as our age, and hopefully our wisdom, increases.

I can remember those law school days at Georgetown University in Washington D.C., during Bill Clinton’s first campaign for president and his heated attempt at dethroning George H.W. Bush (Bush ’41).

I remember watching the debates in the student lounge surrounded by very liberal aspiring lawyers, just brimming at the opportunity to get their hands on some of that federal government largess.

I remember the vehemence I felt about this election and against the prospect of the philandering Bill Clinton and his robotic running mate, Al Gore, actually ascending to presidency.

Well that was then, this is now. Time and experience have gradually shifted my perspective and have me veering left these days…some might even say “far left”!

Why is that, I have to ask myself?

I can only attribute it to my time here in Costa Rica. The opportunity living here has allowed me to be someone “on the outside looking in.”

There are certain things about this place that have brought about this grand paradigmatic shift. First, I would have to say living here has ignited a deeply felt appreciation for nature and biodiversity and also a concern for how over-consumption threatens them. I no longer buy into the argument that human achievement cannot coincide with respect for and care of the environment.

Ignoring the symbiosis that exists between us and our environment and instead religiously adhering to the idea that “people matter more than trees, or the critters that live in them”, has set our planet on a course that threatens exactly what the idea was suppose to promote…humans. You see if we destroy our environment in the pursuit of more consumption and a higher social-economic position, we end up destroying ourselves. Al Gore, and not Rush Limbaugh, was and is right on that one. I didn’t recognize that back at Georgetown, but I certainly do now.

Second, there is a realization that U.S.-style consumption, driven largely by the bizarre notion of “American Exceptionalism”, has placed the country at odds with the rest of the world and set it on a course for disaster.

What do I mean “driven largely by the bizarre notion of ‘American Exceptionalism”, you ask?

Good question. Let me put it this way, the idea on the right seems to be along the following lines; that since the U.S. has done so much good in the world, it is privileged to exploit other nations and peoples in pursuit of a lifestyle that is at a level of luxury that is absurd in comparison to the way folks live in other places, like Costa Rica for instance. In other words, the rest of the world should just look the other way while we consume ourselves, and them, out of existence.

I have in many past posts to this blog cited examples of U.S. intervention into the affairs of other nations in pursuit of this ideal. That it has the right to pursue its own selfish interests, be it for oil (Middle East) or bananas (Central America), within your borders and if you try to stop it, well, then you’re a “communist” and that gives us the right to pressure you with our economic and/or military might, or just take you out altogether.

Third, I have come to realize that pure U.S.-style unbridled capitalism, “capitalism run amok” as I have called it, is as rotten to the core as the communistic or socialistic alternatives that its proponents rail against. The idea that the only thing that matters is “property” is all fine and good for the owners of the property, but how about for everyone else?

Can I as a poor, destitute person, who has not had the good fortune to have been borne with a silver spoon in my mouth, place my confidence in your altruism, Mr. Property Owner? I seriously doubt it.

The fact is that if you are so fortunate as to have accumulated great wealth during your lifetime, and I am all for honest achievement and believe the government should not get in the way of that, then yes you do have a responsibility to care for those that have not been so fortunate or blessed. AND if you won’t exercise that responsibility on your own, then government should step in and do it for you.

Why?

Because there are actually some things that matter more than the right to private property. And those things that matter more are PEOPLE and the PLANET in which they inhabit.

The right-wing of the powers that be in the U.S. have long been so obsessed with guarding capitalistic notions of private property that they have forgotten that those latter two things matter just as much, perhaps even more.

Maybe that is changing a little now…we shall see.

Post update: The recent election (and the rise of Donald Trump) is proof that nothing has really changed and that perhaps, it’s gotten worse.

Archives for October 2016

Connect with RM